Friday, December 16, 2005

I said

I said the word today
The one that took my voice.

The word that fills me with disgust...
at you...and me.

You know the word too
It doesn't shower you with humiliation... or fear
Wonder what you do feel ?

I said the word and didn't die.
I said the word and no one left.

I said the word.

I said the word today and felt shame
and free.

I felt guilt and
calm.

I felt powerless...
not helpless.

I said the word with MY voice
and was believed.

I said the word and was okay...
enough.

I said the word and took my life back
or at least my voice.

I said the word Sam...can you ?

The word is enema.
There, it's out there in the light....
for all to hear and see...
me.

I was anally sodomized with an enema.
Fuck, those are some powerful words.

They won't silence me again...
or you.

11 comments:

spankingbarbie said...

hot damn girl....you DID IT! *giant hugs* Take it back girl.....take back your life!!!!!!!

Barbie

Southern Sage said...

at's m'girl.

We will beat this. There is no shame. NONE. You didn't cause it, it wasn't choice. No Shame.

We, you and blogville, will beat this.

Good JuJu

Another Ordinary Girl said...

Congrats! You said it! That's great! You will beat this. You have alot of people pulling for you!!!!

{{{HUGS}}}

Lil Brat said...

Good for you! I know how hard it has been for you to be able to say that. I'm proud of you for reaching that point in your own time.

dangergirl said...

Barbie - yeah, I did say it so good for me !! Doesn't feel that way yet - lol.

SS - hey, you put this ball in motion by pimping my blog. The outpouring of support from you and the rest of blogville made the difference. Thank you.

AOG - thanks for hanging with me and being a witness. I feel like I should get a big cookie or something. LOL

LB - your support and friendship has made such a difference. Thank you for being there...always.

dg

the princess said...

It's so awesome a feeling to get it out of your head I'll bet. I'm very happy for you. Things are looking up. be strong.

nitebyrd said...

Letting it out will help the pain and uglyness dissipate. Not right away but eventually. You have a strong voice and a strong will. You're damn amazing!

Lil Bit said...

Oh sweet lady, sorry I'm so late in being a witness for you; I've been on a lil holiday break.

But I'm so proud of you. I know how difficult it was just to voice it, and now that you have, your power will slowly return. It's not gonna happen overnight, but you're definitely heading in the right direction, hon.

*biiiiiiiiiiig hugs* =)

dangergirl said...

princess - it feel very liberating to say it and very gratifying for the amazing response I have received from folks like you.

nitebyrd - WOW, thanks for your comment. I believe you about it dissipating - it already has.

lilbit - girl, no need for apologies. I took a holiday break myself.

You've been my witness the entire time - thank you. I can talk about it now and it is a mother fuckin' WHOLE lot better.

God, he's such an asshole.

dg

Anonymous said...

It's very powerful what you're doing, even more powerful than it is hard. Though I'm sure it doesn't feel that way. *smile* Good for you, and good for all the people you're helping with your bravery. *hug*

I love the way you're taking back your voice and your life. Here's to an awesome 2009!

Alyx

dangergirl said...

Alyx- thnx for your support and kind words. I don't feel brave, just determined. I'm sure you find that hard to believe. LOL

I agree - here's to an AWESOME 2009 for us both!!!

dg